Maya Talisman Frost's article is reprinted here.
Mindfulness and Commonality: Finding Your Others by Maya Talisman Frost Wherever you go in this world, you can find others who value the same things you do. But it's also true that there are some places where you might find it is EASIER to meet your Others!
The turning point in our decision to make a big move (from Oregon to Mexico and from Mexico to Argentina) was seeing clearly what we valued and figuring out where we were most likely to find others with the same values. If you have different ideas about what is important than most of the people in your community, you end up feeling unfulfilled and disconnected.
The solution? Figure out what matters to you and find the Others who feel the same way. Exhaust every opportunity to connect with them in your community. Step out a bit and see if you can find them in a nearby community. See if you can start your OWN group of people--a handful of those who are hungry to connect with others with the same values.
Still not working? Then perhaps it's time to take a bigger step OUT.
There's nothing more defeating than feeling like you're immersed in a culture --or subculture--which emphasizes ideals that have nothing to do with the way you want to live. Whether you're talking about a neighborhood, a workplace, a particular field or a school setting, it's important to have a good fit. Otherwise, you end up feeling like you're biting your tongue all
day, unable to have any meaningful dialogue about what's REALLY on your mind.
Sure, there are online forums where you can find your Others. That's a good start, but having a virtual community just isn't the same as having a friend or group you can hang out with for face-to-face conversations and support.
The good news? Chances are good that there are Others all around you who are feeling just like you! That's right--they are thinking, "If only I could meet someone who is into A instead of B" while there you are, thinking the same thing!
The challenge is finding a way to overcome the silence and CONNECT. Finding even
just ONE PERSON can give you room to breathe and allow you to stop biting your
poor mangled tongue.
We tend to be overly concerned about protecting privacy or offending people we don't know well. Instead of worrying about saying the wrong thing, try offering a statement or question likely to perk up the ears of your Others out there, and pay attention to hints that might tell you who your Others are--and who they're not.
You're on a mission to find your Others. Where are they? Who are they? How
are they meeting each other?
Read what they read. Go to events they are likely to attend. Find ways to connect
and make friends with someone who is longing to meet someone like YOU.
They're out there, your Others. Once you find them, you'll be amazed at all the Others parties that were going on all around you the whole time! Your Others are likely to greet you with open arms. Won't that feel good?
Pay attention. Listen to what you're longing for. Look for your Others. Connect.
Your tribe is waiting.
© Copyright 2007, Maya Talisman Frost Maya Talisman Frost has taught thousands of people how to pay attention. Through her company, Real-World Mindfulness Training, she offers powerful, playful, eye-wide-open alternatives to meditation. To read her free tips and tricks for everyday awareness, visit http://www.Real-WorldMindfulness.com
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Contact Maya Talisman Frost Email: Maya@MassageYourMind.com Phone: 971-223-0626
SINewswatch would like to thank Maya Talisman Frost for granting permission to reprint this article.
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