Emmanuel Segui's blog article is reprinted here.
Building Your Child's Self Esteem
Emmanuel Segui
It’s one of those things that all parents want to provide for their children and one of those things that many feel they do not know how to do: raise a self-confident child. Self esteem oftentimes
seems like a fragile, distant thing that we all know what it is but don’t know how to develop.
Your self esteem is a compilation of how you feel about yourself. It encompasses everything from your confidence in relationships, to your body image, to your work life. So how do you foster this “thing” in your children?
We teach our children “honesty is the best policy.” This applies to how we deal with our children as much as it does expecting them to be honest with us. When it comes to your child’s self- esteem, he or she will know or be able to sense if you are not being honest.
For example, if art is not your child’s top skill, don’t say that his or her drawing is the best you’ve ever seen. Your child will know it’s not, and will not believe you the next time you say something meant to be positive, no matter how honest it is. Instead, tell your child something genuine about the piece or the effort.
Make non-judgmental statements such as, “You really used your imagination in making the flowers many different colors.” This simply states your observation, rather than a false statement.
Also, understand that your child and your child’s behavior are two separate things. This can be very hard to remember, particularly when your child is acting out in ways that make you crazy or that are unsafe.
However, when you discipline your child for the behavior rather than the person, you can positively influence and foster self esteem. Why? If your child feels that you are mad, because of who he or she is as a person rather than for the behavior, this can negatively affect your child’s self-esteem.
Using “I” statements helps with this. Say something like,“I don’t like it when you leave your toys scattered all over the floor,” which also addresses the behavior, rather than, “You are a slob,” which attacks their character.
About the Author
Emmanuel SEGUI is a NLP Meta-master practitioner and the author of an amazing new ebook, "Moving From Vision To Action" that will teach how to easily empower yourself and other people to bring true power, focus, health and energy into their life.
Click now => http://www.vision-to-action.com
*SINewswatch would like to thank Emmanuel Segui for granting permission to reprint this blog article.
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